Cluedo

“Cluedo = Clue + Ludo. Ludo is a classic British game – a simplified game of India. Ludo is not played in the U.S. Instead, Americans play Parcheesi. But ‘Cluecheesi’ doesn’t quite work. So we just stuck with ‘Clue’.” via bit.ly/41IHTTS

The Christmasaurus

Our bedtime story game has rapidly leveled up from board books to chapter books.

Right now we’re listening to The Christmasaurus audiobook on Davy’s Yoto radio and reading along in the hardcover.

The audiobook is British and the hardcover we have has been Americanized. I’ve texted changes I’ve noticed to a few friends and realized that this is just the sort of pedantic obsession that should live on the chronofile.

What follows is not an exhaustive list of changes, but those that stick in my mind without taking active notes at bedtime. There is a possibility of human error.

I’ll update this post as we read, but I’ve already ordered a UK hardcover (from Blackwells who offer free shipping to the US.) I find these changes really remove so much British charm.

Ok, time for the pedantry.

  • mum → mom

  • millimetres → inches

  • rubbish → terrible

  • tastes like marmite → tastes like chicken

  • tele → TV

  • school dinner → lunch

  • dinner ladies → lunch ladies

  • chips → French Fries

  • car park → parking lot

  • flask → cup

  • cutlery → silverware

  • wardrobe → closet*

  • loo → restroom

  • jumper → sweater

  • loony → strange

  • no mates → (completely cut)

  • hell → horrible

  • nattering → chattering

  • plug hole → drain

  • barmy →

  • red post box → mailbox

  • post → mail

  • ickle → little

  • it wasn’t anything to do with → it had nothing to do with

  • goose pimply → goose bumpy

  • cracker in the works → wrench in the plan

  • handmade → made

  • → horrible

  • upon → on

  • cinema → theater

  • spotty → polka dot

  • whilst → while

  • pound notes → dollar bills

  • holidays → vacations

  • takeaway → takeout

  • snooker → pool

  • dreamt → dreamed

  • fairy lights → Christmas lights

  • stroppy → spoiled

  • opening hours → regular hours

  • GET ON! → HURRY UP!

  • I guess we should start at the beginning. → Let’s give it a try.

  • dressing gown → bathrobe

  • the shudders → the shivers

  • gawping → gaping

  • a maniac with a gun → saving a dinosaur from a hunter

  • barmy → out of his mind

  • absolutely potty → absolutely zany

  • scrummy → scrumptious

  • pool → pond

  • can’t make people die → can’t hurt people

  • take out a teacher → take down a teacher

  • said from somewhere → came from somewhere

  • they → the boys

  • whilst → while

Honestly I was fascinated by this little linguistic differences when I lived in London for a year. Chips to fries and jumper to sweater is almost understandable. And I can’t imagine including hell in a middle grade novel. 🤯 But all together the changes break the story’s sense of place.

The marmite one is particularly worrisome as it completely changes the meaning.

British terms the editor didn’t spot included:

  • fairy liquid (a brand of UK dish soap)

  • pants (meaning underpants)

There were also some sentence structure changes. Words swapped round.

And there seem to be opposing editorial stances on how often to repeat a character’s name. I found most of these changes ruined the rhythm.

It was clear straightaway that this must be the reason this book (and many others) do not have audiobooks for sale in American Audible. They’ve made too many changes to the text they would have to re-record it. And it wouldn’t even work with an American narrator or a British one by this point. It’s all muddled up.

* Imagine if they’d rewritten Narnia as The Lion, The Witch, and The Closet?! 😡