From the Compost Heap header. A pencil style illustration of a compost heap with flowers and plants growing around it. A bee buzzes by and a white rabbit hops by.
  • Please stop calling yourself an HSP. 😫

    Hyper sensitivity is real, but the term HSP dehumanizes autistic people.

    Ok, deep breath.

    I needed to pull you in with the title, but that may have flared up your nervous system. Let’s start over.

    I’m mindful that I’m addressing sensitive humans.

    You might find it hard to change your mind because it means admitting that you’re wrong. I get it.

    I’ve felt that way too.

    We’re all imperfect humans trying to understand the world around us. Let me be clear that I’m not saying anyone is a bad person.

    But I am asking you to stop doing something that is hurting me, and I hope you’ll listen. My heart is beating like crazy while I type this, but HSP is trending and it’s only getting more popular.

    I don’t think the sensitive souls using it realize how much pain it is causing autistics like myself.

    I’m asking you to open yourself to the possibility that you might be using a term you do not fully understand.

    Did you know the term HSP is based on the book “Highly Sensitive Person” by Elaine Aron?

    I want to be clear that my issue with HSP is rooted in Aron’s writings. (She coined the term.) I have no doubt that you are highly sensitive and that your body processes sensory input in an intense way. I also remember the relief at realizing that truth for myself and reframing my sensitivity as a difference and not a character flaw.

    The term “highly sensitive person” sounds universal and harmlesss. But unfortunately HSP carries a lot of baggage and pain for any autistic person familiar with this book.

    Here is a direct quote from Aron concerning autistic people,

    “Their problem seems to be a difficulty recognizing where to focus attention and what to ignore.

    When speaking with someone, they may find the person’s face no more important to look at than the pattern on the floor or the type of lightbulbs in the room.

    Naturally they can complain intensely about being overwhelmed by stimulation… but in social situations, especially they more often notice something irrelevant, whereas HSPs would be paying more attention to subtle facial expressions, at least when not overaroused.”

    This passage alone expresses a deeply ill informed and outdated conception of autism. This is unsurprising because the book was first published in 1996 … long before the neurodiversity movement.

    Aron’s views toward autistics are harmful and blatantly inaccurate.

    • Many autistics are acutely aware of facial expressions and may even be hyper empathic. *
    • It is a myth that all autistic people struggle with eye contact. †
    • When autistic people do struggle with eye contact one of the main causes is sensory overload. ‡
    • It is dehumanizing to judge what the autistic person is looking at or noticing as irrelevant. (Yes, we do notice small details sometimes! But it doesn’t mean we aren’t listening if we aren’t reacting the way you expect.)

    This book was published in 1996. It is outdated and should go out of print.

    Before we go any further it’s really important to start with this:

    If you’ve met one autistic person you’ve met one autistic person.

    If you know someone who is autistic you may think that you understand autism, but we are each incredibly unique.

    One person may love loud music the other might cover their ears.

    One kid plays elbow deep in mud the other can’t bear to touch it.

    One person loves running into the ocean the other can’t shower because they hate feeling water on their face.

    No single person has every autistic trait.

    This is why we say autism is a spectrum.

    Imagine it like a color wheel.

    Each color is a different intensity of a certain autistic trait.

    Autism Spectrum The Autism Spectrum is NOT linear (rainbow bar chart) less autistic very autistic The Autism Spectrum looks more like (a color wheel): Social differences interests repetitions sensory sensitivities emotional regulation perception executive functioning other (Each wedge of the color wheel is filled in to different degrees.) Terms like "high functioning", "low functioning" and "Asperger" are harmful and outdated.

    If you identify as HSP you may not identify fully with autism at this time.

    That is okay.

    You could always call yourself “highly sensitive” or “hyper sensitive” or even just “sensitive.”

    But it’s not okay to call yourself an HSP when the term perpetuates harmful stereotypes against autism.

    I read the HSP book long ago, when I thought I myself might be an HSP and not autistic. So I know the main premise of the book is that your sensitivity is a difference and not a disorder.

    I agree!

    And guess what?

    It’s no longer the 90’s, and there is better language for that.

    Neurodiversity

    What is neurodiversity?

    “‘Neurodiversity’ is a term that suggests the human race is improved by having a diversity of different kinds of brains – like biodiversity in nature, having lots of different brains in a society means we have people with different strengths who can work together.” §

    If you experience more sensitivity than the average person you are… neurodivergent.

    It’s that simple.

    If you identify as highly sensitive you are welcome and invited to identify as neurodivergent.

    No diagnosis necessary.

    White child sized t shirt on a silver clothes hanger covered in clothing tags of various brands and sizes.

    But… you might also be autistic.

    Sensory differences are central to the autistic experience.

    Many of us believe that our sensory differences are the root cause of all other differences.

    Just look at these two brains.

    Two brain scans. The one on the left is a rainbow web reaching into all areas of the brain. The image on the right is a rainbow ribbon traveling along the language center of the brain.

    It is clear that the autistic brain (left) is processing much more sensory input than the brain on the right (neurotypical.) Differences in sensory integration may be directly related to language differences, social differences, etc.

    There are also so many autistic strengths that are never mentioned! All of that extra information that our brain doesn’t filter out as “unnecessary” makes us excel at pattern recognition and problem solving. Autistic brains notice and make connections that neurotypical don’t even perceive.

    But you may not realize this because even the professionals can’t all agree on what adult autism looks like.

    Did you know that there isn’t a fixed diagnostic criteria for autism in adults?

    They are using a test that was developed for kids and the whole process needs to be reformed. New research is slowly coming in that validates unstereotypical autistic experience.

    The field of autism is in flux.

    Early autism research was limited to aggressive nonspeaking white boys for a long time and only recently has the field begun to realize the variety of presentations autism can take. **

    If you identify as hyper sensitive I’d really encourage you to follow some autistic adults to learn more about the autistic experience and to do some more research on “masked autism”.

    Whatever you do I ask that you don’t think of autistic people as “less than” and see more of a kinship in our hypersensitive (or hyposensitive) experiences.

    Not sure where to start?

    Read my “What is autism?” post.

    Visit my library of neurodiversity affirming resources for podcasts, videos, books & more.

    Or subscribe for monthly-ish emails from me. I share my own lived experience and often write about creativity and neurodivergence.


    As an autistic mum of an autistic kid this topic is close to my heart.

    Right now I’m working on a picture book about sensory processing with autistic artist Gracie Klumpp. If you’d like to support the project you can preoder a copy (or donate one to a school or library) here.

    Illustration of individual wearing a checkered jacket standing in a sea breeze with eyes closed. Around their head is a blue halo with photographs of blue objects including seaweed, shells, and a ticket stub.

    FOOTNOTES

    * Why so many women don’t know they’re autistic with Katherine May. Glennon Doyle’s We Can Do Hard Things Episode 220.

    † Fact or fiction: people with autism never make eye contact. https://www.universiteitleiden.nl/en/news/2023/03/fact-or-fiction-people-with-autism-never-make-eye-contact

    ‡ How do adults and teens with self-declared Autism Spectrum Disorder experience eye contact? A qualitative analysis of first-hand accounts https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5705114/

    § Autism Resource Page https://katherine-may.co.uk/autism-resource-page

    ** Gender Differences in Misdiagnosis and Delayed Diagnosis among Adults with Autism Spectrum Disorder

    Racial/Ethnic Disparities in the Identification of Children With Autism Spectrum Disorders


    Image Credits

    Birds Flying: Bernard Hermant via Unsplash

    Illustration by @autistic_sketches on Instagram

    Brain Scan images via Schneider Lab

    Read more: Please stop calling yourself an HSP. 😫
  • Making 360 VR with a 3 year old collaborator ✨

    Gray green rabbit hopping over the text 
"down the rabbit hole" in a typewriter font

    Hullo all,

    I’m playing with the structure a bit here. Trying out categories rather than themed emails. I’m also bringing back some old themes long time supporters may recognize.

    Let me know what you think.

    I haven’t had much studio time this month unless you count making Number Block counting beads with Davy and the 3 hour masterclass I took from Amie McNee & Jimmy Winestock.


    A peek into my creative process and an update on my collection, This is my Brain on Motherhood.

    This week I’m sharing a sneak peek at a 360 VR piece I made in December. It’s taken a while to work out how to share this online.

    Still frame of 360 VR experience. A white play button floats over a nursery. Dark red yarn is strung around the room.

    UNRAVEL

    2023 / VR 360
    An immersive experience demonstrating my internal experience of motherhood.
    As an autistic parent my brain does not prune synaptic pathways. This means to process information I often have to unravel a tangle of connected thoughts among sensory input, memories, and connections most people would overlook.

    There are two ways to experience this work.

    • If you have the YouTube app you can experience this work in VR here. Just moving your phone to look around. Please select HD by tapping the cog or it will load super blurry. 🫣
    • Don’t have the YouTube app? Here’s a simulation of how it looks in 3D.
    • Or you browse still photographs here.

    Curious about the process? Here’s a timelapse.

    This piece was inspired by a piece of writing by Hayley Dunlop which reminded me of doing this as a child. It was purely creative play at the time. I later revisited this process in directing class when I was asked to “completely transform the space.”

    Hayley’s writing connected this memory to neurodivergent thought patterns which immediately made me want to create this with Davy.

    Working alongside him added all sorts of layers – both layers of meaning – and literal pools of knots (which were never part of my previous efforts.) 😂


    of shoes and ships and sealing wax header in typwriter font

    Other bits and bobs I’d like to recommend this week.

    • Katherine May’s podcast How We Live Now with Priya Parker – This is a chat about gathering well and drawing the lines we need around different social events and communities. I couldn’t have listened to this as a better time as I had been struggling with the Code of Conduct for my membership program and this gave me all the confidence to go with my gut. I’ve also ordered Priya’s book (affiliate link) which happens to have a gorgeous watercolor cover.
    • We’ve subscribed to the newspaper for the first time ever and I loved this article about artist Thaddeus Mosley.
    • Waiting for a quiet moment to enjoy this studio tour…

    I also admired these shadows.

    Windy stick casts shadows on white studio wall

    Minor updates March 2025 to correct links and images.

    Read more: Making 360 VR with a 3 year old collaborator ✨
  • Celebrating an Autism Diagnosis

    I’m an autistic adult and parent of an autistic child. I really recommend framing a diagnosis as a positive milestone and celebrating it as such.

    We celebrate the anniversary of our diagnosis’ each year and call this our “Neurotype Day.” *

    * Shout out to my friend Hayley Dunlop for coining this.

    Read more: Celebrating an Autism Diagnosis
  • Support Tools for Autism, ADHD & Sensory Processing

    I’ve put together some of our favorite support tools for autism & neurodivergence: fidgets, timers, art supplies (art is so beneficial for self regulation), and books.

    Self Regulation Tools

    The remaining links point toward Amazon for now because it is the most accessible source for most people. Please consider that many autistic and neurodivergent people rely on Amazon for products they need.*

    We need to support our own nervous systems so we can make the changes we want to see in the world.

    If you prefer to shop elsewhere you are invited to do so. Simply use these product pages as jumping off points to find similar items in indie shops. If you purchase through these links I receive a very tiny referral fee.

    Harkla Sensory Diet Workbook

    If you’re new to the idea of sensory regulation this is a great resource. It is geared toward kids, but much of it is also applicable to adults. Our needs don’t disappear – we just get older. (Affiliate Link)

    Watercolor cards with sensory supports and spread out on a table with art supplies

    Further Reading

    Check out my picture book How it Feels to Me.

    Illustration of individual wearing a checkered jacket standing in a sea breeze with eyes closed. Around their head is a blue halo with photographs of blue objects including seaweed, shells, and a ticket stub.

    Or browse below to shop more of my favorite books about autism, sensory processing, and neurodivergence.


    FOOTNOTES

    * Reasons why autistic people rely on Amazon may include: overstimulation when shopping, chronic illness, under-employment, or rural locations where products are simply not available.

    Read more: Support Tools for Autism, ADHD & Sensory Processing
  • Autism 101 for Parents

    I’m an autistic adult and parent of an autistic child. After years of internalizing my neurodivergent traits as “flaws” my child’s diagnosis changed everything for me. Learning about how autistic brains are wired helped me begin to reframe autistic traits as differences and find ways to better support both of us.

    Here is what I wish I’d known about myself growing up.

    Drawing of brain with colorful paint splatters over the top
    WHAT IS NEURODIVERGENCE?
    Watercolor illustration of the autism spectrum. A rainbow of colors blending into one another like a color wheel.
    What is autism?
    Fish bowl with red and yellow ink creating swirls like Jupiter.
    What is overstimluation?
    Logos for each sense. Finger for touch. Tongue for taste. Transparent body with heart for interoception. Ear for hearing. Eye for sight. Trampoline for vestibular. Nose for smell. Hula hoop for proprioception
    SENSORY PROCESSING WORKSHOP

    “On the Spectrum”

    When we talk about autism or neurodivergence we often mention a spectrum. Sometimes this is misunderstood as a range of intensity from “more” to “less.” But you cannot be “more” or “less” autistic or neurodivergent.

    I made a zine to illustrate the complexity and nuance of being “on the spectrum.” You can read it here.

    Spectrum: a zine about neurodivergence. Paper zine with magazine cutout letters and a watercolor spectrum with a rainbow of colors blending into one another.

    Celebrating Autism

    On a personal note, I made this video to celebrate my child’s autism diagnosis and share the news with our family. I really recommend framing a diagnosis of autism or ADHD as a positive milestone and celebrating it as such. We celebrate the anniversary of our diagnosis each year as our Neurotype Day.*

    High Masking

    It’s really important that parents consider whether they might be neurodivergent themselves. Autism and other types of neurodivergence are genetic. If you child is on the spectrum there is high chance one or both parents are also.

    Even if you don’t have enough traits for a diagnosis recognizing and supporting your neurodivergent traits is really critical.

    Neurodiversity Affirming Professionals

    Here are some therapists I have enjoyed learning from.

    Neurodiversity Affirming Education

    Daniella (@autism.conmigo) is an Autistic + ADHD parent of 2 autistic kids with a doctorate degree in education. She offers 1:1 support and consultations.

    I’ve worked with Daniella personally and highly recommend her for support home educating or advocating for your kids within traditional schools.

    Support Tools & Further Reading

    Click here for links to my favorite fidgets, sensory reset tools, and books.

    Watercolor cards with sensory supports and spread out on a table with art supplies

    How it Feels to Me

    You may also be interested my picture book, How it Feels to Me – an introduction to sensory processing for readers of all ages.

    Cover design test for How it Feels to Me - a cream cover with swatches of colors: blues, greens, oranges, the title and a dark skinned human standing at the center surrounded by a halo of objects: tokens, leaves, a traffic cone, seashell, and more color swatches. Written by Sarah Shotts. Illustrated by Gracie Klumpp. Proof #1.

    Return to the

    Neurodiversity Affirming Resource Library


    FOOTNOTES

    * Shout out to my friend Hayley Dunlop for coining this.

    Read more: Autism 101 for Parents
  • Autistic Adults

    Do you identify with some autistic traits, and want to learn more?

    Here are some resources I’ve gathered specifically for you.


    Blog Posts

    Birds flying across a pale blue sky
    Please stop calling yourself an hsp
    Watercolor illustration of the autism spectrum. A rainbow of colors blending into one another like a color wheel.
    What is autism?
    Drawing of brain with colorful paint splatters over the top
    What is neurodivergence?
    White child sized t shirt on a silver clothes hanger covered in clothing tags of various brands and sizes.
    WHAT IS OVERSTIMLUATION?

    “On the Spectrum”

    When we talk about autism or neurodivergence we often mention a spectrum. Sometimes this is misunderstood as a range of intensity from “more” to “less.” But you cannot be “more” or “less” autistic or neurodivergent.

    I made a zine to illustrate the complexity and nuance of being “on the spectrum.” You can read it here.

    Spectrum: a zine about neurodivergence. Paper zine with magazine cutout letters and a watercolor spectrum with a rainbow of colors blending into one another.

    Podcasts

    Katherine May on Glennon Doyle’s podcast We Can Do Hard Things, Episode 220

    This is a great place to start breaking down stereotypes. Please remember when listening that every autistic experience is unique (…we don’t all see rainbows.) 🌈

    And a few more podcasts.

    Blogs & Websites

    Books & Support Tools

    I’ve collected some of our favorite fidgets, regulation tools, art supplies and books here.

    Screenshot of Amazon affiliate page with images of fidgets, timers, art supplies and books.

    How it Feels to Me

    You may also be interested my picture book, How it Feels to Me – an introduction to sensory processing for readers of all ages.

    Cover design test for How it Feels to Me - a cream cover with swatches of colors: blues, greens, oranges, the title and a dark skinned human standing at the center surrounded by a halo of objects: tokens, leaves, a traffic cone, seashell, and more color swatches. Written by Sarah Shotts. Illustrated by Gracie Klumpp. Proof #1.

    Return to the

    Neurodiversity Affirming Resource Library

    Read more: Autistic Adults
  • What is Overstimulation?

    I made this video to share my experience of overstimulation.

    I also find that my autistic traits are almost always rooted in sensory differences. So this a helpful place to start when discussing autism. Overstimulation can also be experienced by ADHDers.

    (There’s also a shorter 30 second version here.)

    Return to the

    Neurodiversity Affirming Resource Library

    Read more: What is Overstimulation?
  • How it Feels to Me

    How it Feels to Me is a picture book about neurodiversity for all ages. 

    This book explores the science behind how we each experience the world. Readers will learn about differences in sensory experiences and better understand themselves and others. This book is written and illustrated by two autistic creators making the book they wish they’d had growing up.

    Concept art for how it feels to me

    Learn more…

    This self published book is fully funded and in the proofing stage. If you’d like to know more about the inspiration behind this project you can watch our crowdfunding video here.

    Support the project by preordering a limited edition hardcover.

    Or choose to donate a copy to a school, library, or a neurodivergent family in financial hardship.

    Meet Sarah & Gracie

    I am wearing overalls singing books. I'm sitting under a maple tree next to a pile of books on a quilt.

    Sarah Shotts (author) is an autistic interdisciplinary artist and author of Discover Your Creative Ecosystem. Their writing has also been published in Ought: The Journal of Autistic Culture. Sarah earned a Masters degree in Applied Drama from Goldsmiths University of London and a bachelors in Fine and Performing Arts at Mississippi University for Women (MUW.)

    Gracie has short dark hair and glasses and is wearing a bandana and holding a paintbrush.

    Gracie Klumpp (illustrator) Gracie is an autistic illustrator and writer who lives in an old Airstream, and never runs out of stories. She’s not always the best at talking about them—but that’s why she’s always creating them. Gracie studied Digital Media Arts: Animation at Huntington University, and has used her animation chops to inform her illustration work since graduating. Gracie makes storytelling magic in all sorts of mediums, and doesn’t really mind which she uses so long as it serves the story best.


    Related Posts

    Read more: How it Feels to Me
  • What is neurodivergence?

    The word neurodivergence is made of two parts. Neuro meaning brain. And divergence meaning to differ. Neurodivergence means that your brain processes the world differently.

    Every human is unique, but most brains have certain things in common.

    Neurodivergent folks experience the world differently. Our brains are processing information in different ways. There are lots of types of neurodivergence including dyslexia, dyscalculia, synesthesia, OCD, dyspraxia, etc. Each with specific ways the brain differs from most people.


    Choose Your Adventure

    This is a micro post. Continue learning about neurodivergence below.

    Or browse all of the posts I’ve written about neurodivergence.

    Read more: What is neurodivergence?